I’m still reading your posts

To compensate, they wait until just after the holidays to have the staff party for all the restaurants owned by the same chain in the city. Tonight is the night of the party! I’m really excited to go, and I’ve heard rumours that these things usually get pretty wild. I’ll be bringing my camera and will hopefully get tons of great pictures. I’d also like a shot of me and Thomas all gussied up…it doesn’t happen very often!

I went shopping this afternoon to try and find a dress to wear and ended up coming home with that and a blazer for work as well.

I love the simplicity of this dress, and plan to pair it with some silver tights and plum shoes. Add in my big red Matt and Nat purse (as seen here) and I think I’m going to look amazing! Still flip-flopping on the tights…I wanted to buy some from American Apparel but I didn’t head down in that direction today. Correction: I got lazy today.

Anyways. I hope Thomas gets home soon — he still has to go buy/rent a suit to wear tonight! But I don’t think that’ll happen…

Pictures to follow!

As Catherine wrote: “It looks like we’re all going to host our own photos to develop our blogs, but we’re around to encourage each other.”

I’m going to use my brand-spanking-new Nikon D3100 and my BlackBerry to take photos every day, and will try to make them as interesting as possible. In conjunction with my commitment to love myself more this year, if there’s nothing photo-worthy happening in my days (today, for example) then the photo will likely be a self-portrait. I don’t want to take the same picture of myself a half-dozen times, so I’ll have to find interesting ways to do that as well!

Here’s the first photo:

Not the most breathtaking photo I’ve ever taken, but it’s a start! And really, that’s the most important thing. It’s easy for me to get discouraged when I realize that what I produce may not be the most interesting and awesome thing I’ve ever seen (which is also why I’ve been flip-flopping on blogging for so many years) but just coming up with one thing every day seems to be in the realm of possibilities so that has to be my goal.

Check my set on Flickr if you want to keep up with my progress! And definitely look at what Zoey and Catherine are shooting; I know I will be.

For the first time in awhile, I actually hosted New Year’s Eve. I usually prefer to go out to another friend’s house, because that way when I’m done I can just be done; there’s no waiting out the night owls, no awkward hinting that it’s time to call it a night. I just have to put on my jacket and shoes, then head out the door and crawl into my bed.

But it was a fantastic party last night. We all compiled our top ten songs of 2011 and played the lists up until midnight. Then we watched the clock turn over, yelled and cheered, had a few more drinks and then called it a night.

There were drinks, conversation and dancing.

Dancing and some more drinks…

This was my failtastic attempt to capture Thomas and I’s first kiss of the new year. His face and the shadow of my head. Awesome. But he does look very epic in the second shot there. I told him to give me his best “Hero of Canton” pose (from Firefly).

This is the aftermath of the party. Even the cats are exhausted.

In case you’re interested, my Top Ten list was (and we played them countdown-style, starting with 10).

1. Party Rock Anthem, LMFAO
2. Helena Beat – Foster the People
3. After Midnight – Blink-182
4. The Last Crusade – Sam Roberts
5. Ava Adore – Smashing Pumpkins
6. Smooth Criminal – Alien Ant Farm
7. How It Goes – Matthew Good
8. High and Dry – Radiohead
9. Baby Don’t Dance – Mother Mother
10. Factory of Faith – Red Hot Chili Peppers

The rest of today will be dedicated to getting my house back in order, painting my fingernails (I meant to do this two or three days ago!) and I think I’m going to take a nice hot bath too. Hopefully will get it together enough to walk around with my new D3100 and take some pictures of the neighbourhood. I don’t know if I want to try the 365 project; I really want to take more pictures this year, but I don’t want it to be because I feel like I “have to” and I don’t want to feel like I’ve failed if I miss a day. We’ll see.

I do have a few resolutions for 2012 though (sorted into resolutions for intangible things and goals for things that can be accomplished, like in Kendall’s list).

Resolutions:

• Put myself first more often — I’m always putting everyone else before me, but I’m going to be at my best for those in my life when I take the time to make sure I take care of myself before trying to take care of everyone else.
• Learn to let go of things that are beyond my control. I let situations that I can have no impact on take over my thoughts and make me crazy. I can’t control everything, and especially not how other people feel.
• On that note, remember that my way isn’t always the right way. Be humble, continue to give everyone the benefit of the doubt.
• Take more pictures — this may or may not morph into “Complete Project 365.”
• Take control of my finances and be aware of where my money is going
• Be less aware of what others may be thinking of me. If it feels right to me, that’s all that matters.
• Remember to love myself. This includes the superficial and the deep stuff alike. I’m 23, halfway to 24. It’s unlikely for me to change in some huge and fundamental way. Plus, I’m a pretty great person as is! I need to treat myself with the same love and respect as I do others, because again, I don’t always remember to take care of me.

Goals:

• Continue with diving, and finish the bronze level of skills this year
• Work with at least one charitable organization; donate either time, money or skills to make a difference in a campaign.
• Write more, both digitally and longhand. Make it a point to write something every day, even if it’s just a Post-It to put into my journal.

Anyone else make resolutions? How was your New Year’s Eve?

2. Did you keep your New Years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I’m pretty sure I didn’t make any for 2011. Maybe to take more pictures, and if that’s the case I certainly did not keep it. I seem to make resolutions ever other year…

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
I don’t think so, actually! No babies in 2011.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
My dad’s sister, Joan. She was only 50.

5. What countries did you visit?
Went to the US, visited Las Vegas and Palm Desert in February!

6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
Peace of mind and closure.

7. What date from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
May 7. I moved back to Edmonton from Calgary to start my first post-university job.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Getting back into sports and being active. In the new year I’m going to be doing yoga, diving, and a dance class! Also, finding a great job eventually in 2011.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Taking photos of events. Big time fail.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I got food poisoning in Palm Desert and holy shit that was one of the worst things I’ve ever experienced. Up and sick all night, and I couldn’t eat much of anything for the next couple of days my stomach was so beat up.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
Either plane tickets to Ottawa, or my new D3100.

12. Where did most of your money go?
Food, moving costs, expenses/bills.

13. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Blink-182 in August, moving in with Thomas in July, trip to Ottawa in October, new job in November! Apparently I was just really, really, really excited this entire second half of 2011.

14. What song will always remind you of 2011?
Party Rock Anthem, LMFAO. I love that song!

15. Compared to this time last year, are you: Happier or sadder? Older or wiser? Thinner or fatter? Richer or poorer?
Happier, wiser, thinner?, poorer.

16. What do you wish you’d done more of?
I wish I figured out my energy issues sooner, so I could have done more period. I gave up red meat in February 2011 and wasn’t getting enough B12 vitamin for nine months. Sigh.

17. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Procrastinating, dwelling, feeling guilty for things out of my control.

18. How did you spend Christmas?
Thomas and I stayed in Edmonton and had a great holiday with my family on the 24th and the 25th.

19. What was your favorite TV program?
The Office, Nurse Jackie, How I Met Your Mother.

22. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I don’t think so. I dislike more people than I thought I would and that’s sad, but it’s not just coming from me.

23. What was the best book you read?
Hmm. Frankenstein? I read it for my English class. OR 1984, even though I’ve read it before (it’s one of my favourite books!).

24. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Foster the People, Smashing Pumpkins, Matthew Good (rediscovered), Travis.

25. What did you want and get?
A new camera, a couple trips, a job.

26. What did you want and not get?
Dental crowns (I know it’s a weird want).

27. What was your favorite film of this year?
Inception or Easy A.

28. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 23, and I ended up going climbing with my friend Cam. I’ve never made a huge deal out of my birthday, this year was no different .

29. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Leaving Calgary on a good note, not having my roommate/friend hate me and refuse to talk to me.

30. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2011?
Simple and fun.

31. What kept you sane?
Friends, family, Thomas, my cats.

32. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I don’t know, I don’t really get celebrity crushes…

33. What issue stirred you the most?
SOPA (even though it’s not my country’s legislation), Canada pulling out of Kyoto, Harper’s majority win in the election…

34. Who did you miss?
My grandmother. I miss her every day of every year.

35. Who was the best new person you met?
Chantelle from work, probably!

36. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2011:
If you can’t change it, let it go. Take care of yourself first and remember to be kind to others.

It’s funny though, I’m feeling first-world guilty about it. I don’t really need a new DSLR, in that my old one still works just fine. I feel seriously conflicted about this because it’s something I wanted and not something I needed! And it wasn’t cheap (but it was the least expensive one I found…) so I think that’s adding to it. I’m not the person to drop huge sums of money on things (I bought my laptop last winter when mine died on me, and it almost gave me an anxiety attack in the Apple store) and especially not for things that I don’t “need.”

I also stopped taking the amount of photos that I once did with my D40, so again, more guilt. A good photographer doesn’t need the best equipment, just a good eye. I don’t know if I still have the eye, but I want to take more pictures in 2012. Put more up around the house, have a couple of albums so that we can show our friends and family places we’ve been and events we’ve had. 2012 is going to be the year of travel for Thomas and I — two trips at least for us both, probably three for me.

Definitely first world guilt coming on. Ugh. Am I gonna use this? Should I have saved my money and spent it on something more practical? What about my braces in 2012? What about the Mexico trip in February, what about the trip to Coachella Thomas and I want to take? What if what if what if, etc.

Way too in my own head for my own good.

Here are the pictures of Luna I promised:

And some photos I found on Thomas’ memory card from Vegas that are too good not to share!

We drove there at 6:40am (again, seriously), and she howled in the kennel the entire drive. She was sticking her tiny arms out the front of the carrier and almost touching the dashboard from the passenger seat. Every once in awhile she would look right at me through one of the openings along the top of the carrier and just cry. I felt wretched! We ended up arriving early, so I had to sit in the car and listen to her crying for another 10 minutes before the clinic opened to accept the patients for the day.

I drove away and felt like crying. I may have welled up a little bit, even though I knew I was doing the right thing. I went right from the clinic to my parents’ house, since it was on the same side of the river. Hung out there all day, and helped them prep for a holiday party.

I only got to enjoy a couple hours of the party though, ’cause then I had to go pick up Luna and take her home. Cue more crying and howling, but she simmered right down after I let her out.

Now, we have to keep the other cat in the basement, so he doesn’t play too rough with her or try to lick her incision. This will not go over well with Lu, as he doesn’t like to be alone…

This entry is pretty boring, and I would try to jazz it up but I feel like I’m getting sick with a cold. This cannot happen. Christmas is not a huge deal to me, as I’ve mentioned before. New Year’s Eve is my night. I refuse to be sick for New Year’s!

On that note, I’m going to head to bed with a warm cup of mint tea and a good book, and hopefully that’ll will my body into fighting off whatever has me stuffed up and icky-feeling right now.

I have some adorable pictures of pre-surgery Luna and loopy Luna. Will post-process and upload tomorrow.

Have lots of plans for tomorrow (lululemon trip, Ikea trip, house cleaning, photography) so I repeat: body, smarten up. You will not get sick.

Christmas Eve we were at my parents’ house and we opened most of our presents there. He loved what I got him (I think!) — Beatles Abbey Road poster, new backpack from Threadless, Firefly-related T-shirt, two The Walking Dead comics, and a bottle of Wild Rose Cherry Porter. He got me a tin of my favourite tea from David’s Tea, a Matt and Nat purse, and a gorgeous ring.

That's my right hand, btw.

My brother’s girlfriend shouted out “DID WE MISS A SECRET PROPOSAL?” because the ring was inside the purse. Nope….sorry Lizzi. No proposal, secret or otherwise.

But last night we went out for dinner and an interesting tidbit was offered up. My cousin in Ottawa just got engaged, after being with her boyfriend for seven years. Thomas mentioned that everyone in my family is just waiting for that ring. I brought up my cousin, and that her and her (now) fiance were really settled and established before they got engaged, and why would my family expect me to hop on that marriage train six years younger and with less stability in my life? She has a house, they’ve been dating forever, etc.

Thomas said “Well, you know we’re not going to have a house before we get married, right?”

Whoa!

When he speaks, he chooses every word very, very carefully, so I know that wasn’t a slip of the tongue, and I know I’m not reading more into it than there is. Six months ago, that sentence would have been really scary and overwhelming, but now it just sounds right. This is my guy <3

In other news, still working on that resolution list. What do you have so far? Do you make resolutions?

It’s not that I have anything against it; I know some people love this time of year, and I always wish for them a happy and wonderful holiday season. But ever since my late teens, Christmas has always been kind of “meh.”

It’s always wonderful to see my family, and I love giving them gifts that I know they’ll appreciate and enjoy. But when it comes to the decorating, the television specials, the caroling, the baking…I don’t care for that at all. This year I put up exactly one string of lights, across the television. It just doesn’t capture my attention, and I don’t feel like I’m missing out by not having or not doing these things.

I look forward to New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day a lot more (trust me, I know I’m not sounding any more sane!). I love the idea of celebrating the end of the year with a party, to recognize all the achievements and accomplishments of the year, and then to usher in the new year with a fresh slate (and if you’re lucky, a kiss from the person you’ll be spending that year with). I love it! Celebrate, then welcome in the new with love and excitement.

I like New Year’s Resolutions as well. I know it’s hokey to believe that a new year = a fresh start, that the year rolling over on the calendar will make you any more likely to complete your goals as opposed to starting on any other day, etc etc. And I don’t necessarily believe that. But I like the idea of starting a new year with a new mindset, one that will make your year a much more fulfilling or interesting one.

It doesn’t always work out that way, but it’s nice to try and it’s nice to believe that it could happen.

I had a much better blog entry planned out in my head, but now I’m just rambling. I’m thinking of resolutions this week while I’m off work, and I will post them here when I have a definitive list.

What are you doing for the holidays? What are you excited for?